i realise i've changed a lot these few years, & i realised i've also matured. not the blur lil girl in p6 & sec 1, the self-criticising inferior introvert in sec 2 & early sec 3 anymore.

i was really so foolish to think the world would change for me. i wasted so many brain cells & got so depressed just cos i was inferior. now i realise that though i'm absolutely so different from most people, i'm still unique in my own way (: although i'm still a little confused, i'm oblivious to negative comments around me.

i really don't know whether that's good or bad, but that's the only way i can change for the better. if i keep dwelling on others' criticising, i'll get more depressed & inferior. hmm, i've been thinking of how to improve my character. i wanna be strong. i don't wanna cry so much, it really doesn't pay. i want my attitude to be a good one, like Jessica Biel's character in The Illusionist (haha, that's really random).

i'm not really sure if i've matured, & if my current attitude is supposed to be good. but i'm not really sensitive to what others say or think about me, i'm just sensitive to what i do to people around me, for fear of hurting them. isn't that really weird? it's a one way thing; i'm not afraid of ppl hurting me, but more of hurting them. do i put others above myself?

nah, that shan't be solved for now. who knows, i may just change again in a few months' time, and my current attitude will disappear.

*
money makes the world go round.

those stupid rich people are gonna move into OUR house. wtf. you really need this house? then what about US. you think we don't? i dunno what will happen if we move to somewhere else. argh. i love my house can. it's so nice, located near the market, supermarket, mrt, provision shops, hawker centre, tuition centre, park, library etc. what have you got to take over this house huh? sigh, something pathetic yet powerful called MONEY.