i've always wanted to blog about this, but didn't have the time cos i was all addicted to deviantart. yeah.

last thurs i took the mrt home after chem test. nearing paya lebar, i saw this woman pushing a baby pram, you know those which baby sleep in and travel around in? but in it was not a baby. she was a grown-up. probably a teenager, or a young adult, i couldn't tell which. she had some disease and was as thin as anything. she lay down there, and looked so helpless.

i was shocked. the first thought that came to my mind was, she must have been through so much. i felt so sorry for her. almost cried out loud. then i looked at the woman. probably her mother, she was leaning on the mrt pole. she must have been the most miserable.

imagine coming down with a terrible illness, and suddenly you can't walk, you can't talk, you can't do anything. then you see your loved ones caring for you, attending to your every need. you want them to stop helping you, you feel that you are a burden to them, you just want to end it all. you wished you were normal, you wished heaven wasn't so cruel to you.

why is the world so unfair? why do some people get stuck with some disease and can't do what normal people do? they can't have fun, they can't sit in front of the com and go on msn and listen music and play games, they can't go to school, they can't even talk properly. i wished i could help her in some way, but by not staring at her too much, i think that was all i could do. for if i did, they would feel terrible. i know the feeling.

on the way home, i asked myself when did i ever cherish my life? all i did was sit in front of the com and chill, didn't want to touch the textbooks which were collecting dust at home. and when i got stuck in maths or physics, i just couldn't be bothered to solve it. i thought it wasn't worth studying so much.

what the heck. some ppl can't even get to study in school, and here i am whiling away my time instead of doing something constructive.

hope she can get well soon. hope she's receiving medical/financial help. hope others like her will continue to be strong and hope there will be a solution for them.